The Sunday before at Lifeline I was light up and couldn't wait, still no fear.
I think it really hit me on Wednesday when the actual nervousness hit me.
I could hardly breathe, waiting for 5:00 pm to come around and meeting Abby my leader early for the "before" meeting.
Abby and I waited in line for Yesterdog; I didn't get any cause I had butterflies.
The meeting was great and I was happy with my spot (Third person to go) that's when the shaking set in.
Abby and I went downstairs but I went back up to get my Niece Makenzie, hoping she would help with my shaking.
When Brady called us up I started to freak out and had to remind myself to breathe.
After we sang and Brady spoke, our "pod" went up to wait, if you could see me in the dark I was literally shaking from head to foot, my heart raced and of course my speech increased because of my nerves.
Aaron called my name and I had just enough strength to remember how to walk and not fall getting into the tub.
God is the only one who knows what was going on in my head and my heart, I can try and explain what I was feeling other than nerves!
I was overwhelmed with fear AND joy at the same time.
Everything in my heart told me, "Everyone you Love is waiting, everyone you love is sitting in this room." and my mind was telling me, "Slow down stupid! Is that really how my voice sounds? Are they staring... Well duh they are staring!"
And everything I said I was happy with, I worked on that for a year, what I would share and is this what I want.
I've been a swimmer since I could swim, I've LOVED the water my whole life; Nothing felt as amazing as letting go and holding your breath, coming up and knowing everyone I love will never see me the same.
-Side note, my little brother Jacob wanted me to say afterwards, "I feel Holy." But I wasn't going to ;)
Overall, would I do it again? YES.
My timing? God's plan had me getting baptized at 15, I'm not going to argue with that!
Do I regret anything? Yup, I regret being scared and nervous.
If I could give advice it would be? Be strong! This is your chance to give someone else the encouragement to get baptized!!!
My favorite part? The water! and hugs afterwards!!!
God can do anything and everything! I'm an example of His gracious Love!
Thank you to everyone who came and everyone who was just there :)
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| Yup sorry for the selfie! |
And my favorite song:
My foes are many, they rise against me
But I will hold my ground
I will not fear the war, I will not fear the storm
My help is on the way, my help is on the way
Oh, my God, He will not delay
My refuge and strength always
I will not fear, His promise is true
My God will come through always, always
Troubles surround me, chaos abounding
My soul will rest in You
I will not fear the war, I will not fear the storm
My help is on the way, my help is on the way
Oh, my God, He will not delay
My refuge and strength always
I will not fear, His promise is true
My God will come through always, always
I lift my eyes up, my help comes from the Lord
I lift my eyes up, my help comes from the Lord
I lift my eyes up, my help comes from the Lord
I lift my eyes up, my help comes from the Lord
From You Lord, from You Lord
Oh, my God, He will not delay
My refuge and strength always
I will not fear, His promise is true
My God will come through always, always
Oh, my God, He will not delay
My refuge and strength always, always
My favorite verse from that is, "I will not fear the war, I will not fear the storm."
Love is here, Love is now.
-Ashley
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